Can I Have My Rights Please?
In an edition of The Straits Times some time back, there was an article about the perils of being single during Chinese New Year. I think it was written by Sumiko Tan, I may be wrong. When I read it, I laughed and cheered because it was very honest, brutally honest. I totally related to it.
Yes, apparently, I am single, eligible and of a very marriageable age. I had been asked the same questions many times, "Are you married yet?", "Do you have a girlfriend?'. It always doesn't matter how convincing my answers were about my preference to be single. They will give you the impression that they accept your answer but it always comes with a suspecting twitch of the face, or subtle rolling of the eyes. You know that they are saying to themselves, "Think he's gay".
I had come to a point where I find it pointless to rebuke and to explain myself further. If society of late has come to open up it's arms to embrace gays and lesbians, why can't they accept that there are people who are straight and choose to remain unmarried for various reasons!
We people can't win. Why?
(1) You can have as many girlfriends but ultimately marriage seems to be the only way to prove your sexuality.
(2) It seemed that people can accept homosexuality as a lifestyle preference but somehow singlehood is not a lifestyle preference (huh?) but a defect.
(3) Nobody seems to understand that being single is not a sexual preference, it just means you do not want to get married.
Like I said, I am not going to spend more time explaining myself. There is no closet to come out of. Straight singlehood is just simply a lifestyle choice and my frame of mind. Will it last? Maybe and maybe not? And don't worry my dear family and friends, doesn't mean that I am not attached and not gay mean that I am not getting any. Enviably, my sex life might be more varied and fulfilling than yours....monogamous or polygamous.
Ironically, in this present day, it is easier to be single and gay then single and straight. And almost as ironic, as society begins to break down the walls of biasedness against homosexuality, a new age of discrimination against singlehood emerges.
Picture this. 2 guys walking, shopping or having coffee together. In the past, they are just 2 good friends having a male-bonding session or having a heart-to-heart talk. Now?
"Hahahaha... must be sisters!". Sometimes followed by "Such a pity, they are cute!"
Yes, apparently, I am single, eligible and of a very marriageable age. I had been asked the same questions many times, "Are you married yet?", "Do you have a girlfriend?'. It always doesn't matter how convincing my answers were about my preference to be single. They will give you the impression that they accept your answer but it always comes with a suspecting twitch of the face, or subtle rolling of the eyes. You know that they are saying to themselves, "Think he's gay".
I had come to a point where I find it pointless to rebuke and to explain myself further. If society of late has come to open up it's arms to embrace gays and lesbians, why can't they accept that there are people who are straight and choose to remain unmarried for various reasons!
We people can't win. Why?
(1) You can have as many girlfriends but ultimately marriage seems to be the only way to prove your sexuality.
(2) It seemed that people can accept homosexuality as a lifestyle preference but somehow singlehood is not a lifestyle preference (huh?) but a defect.
(3) Nobody seems to understand that being single is not a sexual preference, it just means you do not want to get married.
Like I said, I am not going to spend more time explaining myself. There is no closet to come out of. Straight singlehood is just simply a lifestyle choice and my frame of mind. Will it last? Maybe and maybe not? And don't worry my dear family and friends, doesn't mean that I am not attached and not gay mean that I am not getting any. Enviably, my sex life might be more varied and fulfilling than yours....monogamous or polygamous.
Ironically, in this present day, it is easier to be single and gay then single and straight. And almost as ironic, as society begins to break down the walls of biasedness against homosexuality, a new age of discrimination against singlehood emerges.
Picture this. 2 guys walking, shopping or having coffee together. In the past, they are just 2 good friends having a male-bonding session or having a heart-to-heart talk. Now?
"Hahahaha... must be sisters!". Sometimes followed by "Such a pity, they are cute!"
posted by Wee Cher at 2:30 AM
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